I Eat Paint


Portal of Evil
Crazy People # 10
Night of the Crazy People
Wed, Nov 5th, 2003

Matrix Revolutions
Not really a review, per se...
Wed, Nov 5th, 2003

Engagement, Book, Party
Congratulations!
Mon, Nov 3rd, 2003

The office visitor
I want a cat...
Thu, Oct 30th, 2003

I'm in a book!
I'm just a tad bit excited...
Tue, Oct 28th, 2003

The Corn Maze Report
It's good.
Mon, Oct 27th, 2003

Corn Maze Details
You know you want to come
Mon, Oct 20th, 2003

In which I make good with my readers
(I hope)
Fri, Oct 17th, 2003

<< Crazy People # 10 Fitness for Teens >>
By: Matt Mon, Nov 10th, 2003
Portal of Evil
Helping the world, one dragon at a time

I periodically read Portal of Evil, a website I rarely link to because you'll be hard pressed to find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy. Seriously, don't poke too much around the site if you're easily offended in the slightest. Incidentally, its members include Things I Hate's Annna, Six Six Five's JSP, and Seanbaby.

The main purpose of the site is to serve as an omnibus of the worst of the worst of the Internet. Each entry has the site name, address, a quick description, and a message board where a lot of discussion about the the site occurs.

The word 'Evil' in the title is misleading, as many of the pages aren't evil, just sad and insane. Alex Chiu is a PoE staple, as is All Star Gus Ball.

Essentially, inclusion in Portal of Evil is confirmation that at least a handful of people think that your web site is laughably bad and that you may either be legally insane or retarded. Because of the obvious uncomfortability, the Prime Directive of PoE readership is that you don't tell the person that he or she is being discussed, but when they do, it ends up causing a massive shouting match whose tediousness is rivaled only by its rampant use of logical fallacies and staggering lack of grammar skills.

One that showed up on the list on Friday is 'Starblade,' a guy who earnestly believes that, deep down inside, he's actually a dragon.

What gave me a warm, fuzzy feeling was the fact that even though someone violated the Prime Directive and he ended up on the message board, rather than devolving into a series of defensive arguments, it evolved into a kind of question-and-answer/advice forum wherein the goons at Portal of Evil appear to be genuinely interested in seeing this kid develop social skills.

As insane as it is, it may well be the best resource this kid has. He's certainly not getting any social tips from his other secretly-dragon friends, and it's not as if there's really any non-Internet venue in which a socially maladjusted person can sit down with a socially adjusted person and get tips and pointers.





Apple
Ben
The Bleat
The Customary Cipher
Home Star Runner
Ron's Brain

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 (Name Witheld) - Nov 10th, 2003 at 7:44 pm 
I like your icons! They are sooo cool. I was wondering if you could make a Jabba the Hut icon. I've tried making one, and it hasn't been successful. Thanks!

 Yowza!!ferrotype - Nov 11th, 2003 at 6:17 pm 
Hey Baby!!! I am still alive........ really tired, but alive. I miss you and am trying to continue to get online more often.



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note: All original text ©2004, Matthew E. Poush, I Eat Paint